Heineken

Omigawd! Alligator in NOLA

This alligator was found in New Orleans swimming down the street. 21 FT long, 4,500 lbs, around 80 years old minimum. Specialists said that he was looking to eat humans because he was too old to catch animals. This alligator was killed by the army last Sunday at 3:00 pm, currently he is in the freezer at the Azur hotel. The contents of it's stomach will be analyzed this Friday at 2:30pm.

Laugh out Loud

While looking at others blogs this AM, I ran across this pic and it made me laugh out loud. The writer is from Barcelona, Spain and I've no idea what she's saying about it. If anyone can help me out, please check out her blog and let me know what its all about. She's got other pics that I found quite interesting also. http://dadanoias.blogspot.com/

Another Silly Joke...

A man was walking down the street when he was approached by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a hundred dollars for dinner and a warm, dry place to spend the night.
The man took out his wallet, extracted one hundred dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you spend this on a fishing pole and lures instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you nuts?" replied the homeless man. " I haven't fished in over 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for a lousy hundred bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Will you go down to Space Coast Harley Davidson and buy a chance on the Fatboy raffle?" asked the man.
"No, I gave up motorcycles a long time ago for my wife." the homeless man sadly replied.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and probably smell pretty disgusting, and my life is a total disaster."
The man replied, "That's okay. I just want her to see what a man looks like who's given up beer, fishing, sex, and motorcycles."

Husband Wanted...

A lonely older lady, aged 75, decided it was time to get married. She put a want ad in the local paper that read:

"HUSBAND WANTED. Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me, and must still be good in bed! All applicants must apply in person."

On the second day of the ad she heard the doorbell ring. Much to her dismay, when she opened the door, there sat a man in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs. She asked sardonically "You're not expecting me to consider you, are you? Just look at
you----you have no legs!"

The old man smiled, "Therefore no chance to run around on you!"

She snorted, "You have no arms either!"

Again the old man smiled. "Nor can I beat you!"

The old lady raised her eyebrows and gazed at him intensely. "Are you still good in bed?" she asked.

The old man smirked and said, "I rang the doorbell didn't I?"

I've got several personality disorders...lol

Disorder Rating
Paranoid: Moderate
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: Moderate
Antisocial: Low
Borderline: Moderate
Histrionic: Moderate
Narcissistic: Low
Avoidant: Moderate
Dependent: Low
Obsessive-Compulsive: Low
URL of the test: http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_test.mvURL for more info: http://www.4degreez.com/disorder/index.html

Anti-Depressants?

Does anyone out there have any thoughts on anti-depressants?

I've been feeling down and out lately...

I feel like I could go on a homicidal/suicidal rampage...

I don't like that feeling anymore...

I'm far to old to kill again and I don't think I want to be dead...

I feel lazy all of the time...

I don't like the thoughts going through my head...

I feel shaky on the inside...

I feel like I need something to numb my feelings...

I feel stressed-out most of the time...

My neck and shoulders hurt with stress...

I feel like I need to hunt something down and kill it...

I feel like I could sleep 18 out of 24 hours...

But when I try to sleep, I can't...

Too many thoughts streaming through my head for sleep...

I feel like every day is just one more day and for what?

I feel like I need to dye my hair black and dress in black...

I feel as if I'm in mourning...

What am I mourning the loss of?

I feel the need to drink myself into a stupor...

Poison my body with alcohol...

Numb the bad feelings...

I feel the need to poke out the eyes of my enemies...

and rip out the tongues of liars...

I know a man who's heart I'd like to rip out and then stomp it...

Over and over and over again.

Nothing's wrong with me, right?

It's just everyone else that's fuct up...

Here I Am...somewhere I shouldn't have been!!!

Evacuees or Red Cross?

The floods in NOLA are devastating. I'm considering taking in evacuees or volunteering for the Red Cross. Some people have lost everything that they own. The television is totally disturbing to me...Flood water & rioting is taking is toll on the city. The looting is destroying whats left. I can totally understand opression but why tear up the city in which you live? It makes no sense... If you've got spare time or a spare dollar or two, please consider donating to the Red Cross. http://www.redcross.org/ If you know of a church or other place where the refugees are staying, please try to volunteer your time if you've no money to donate. They can always use volunteers.